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At the Intersection of Sports and Culture

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Bracketscapes: Houston, Texas

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Houston, Texas – Reliant Stadium (Final Four: April 2&4)

Why your dad likes Houston: Because every dad born during the Baby Boom wanted to be an astronaut when they were kids.  Thanks to JFK, my  dear old dad wanted to fly when he was younger only to have his dreams derailed due to poor eyesight. (Be aware that my dad also credits his poor eyesight for ending any chance he ever had of playing in the NFL.)

Signature Food/Drink: With its surprising proximity to the Gulf of Mexico, Houston has some of the finest seafood in the continental US. (Although since the BP disaster I am sure many local Houston eateries have been forced to adjust their menus.) For drinks, it’s tough to uncover an abundance of local craft brews so I am willing to bet that the people of the “Outer Loop” appreciate a good Bud Light while the fine, privileged folks of the “Inner Loop” enjoy themselves some sarsaparilla.

College Basketball History: The city of Houston has a fine tradition of college basketball. The University of Houston boasted one of the best, most prolific programs during the early 1980’s. In 1982-83, Phi Slamma Jamma made it all the way to the National Championship game only to be upset by Jim Valvano and the North Carolina State Wolfpack. That Houston Cougar team featured two of the NBA’s Top 50 players in Hakeem Olajuwon and Clyde Drexler.

Bracket Predictions: Butler over VCU. UConn over Kentucky. Butler over UConn. (And the final score won’t even come down to a Gordon Hayward missed half court shot.)

view from Reliant Stadium courtesy of @RiceSportMgmt

An Opening Day in the Life of a Baltimore Orioles Fan

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I read the news today oh, boy….

When John Lennon and Paul McCartney were writing “A Day in The Life” I wonder if they had the Baltimore Orioles in mind. I say this because the St. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band album was released in 1967 back when Baltimore was still a relevant franchise capable of competing for championships and inspiring fans worldwide. Today, the Beatles still matter while Baltimore hasn’t had a winning record since 1997. As a committed Oriole fan – thanks Dad – Opening Day comes bearing all sorts of conflicting emotions. Do I invest in the promise of a young stable of arms and improved lineup or dread the unavoidable fate awaiting after 18 plus games against AL East superpowers Boston and New York?

Seeing as how Baltimore opens their season tonight in Tampa against the Rays, I thought I would share with you a typical day in the life of an Baltimore Orioles fan on Opening Day.

4:33am: Wake up in a cold sweat. Try to fall back asleep by reading Buster Olney, Tim Kurkjian, and Ken Rosenthal all of who once worked for the Baltimore Sun and this year, for the 10th season in a row, suggest that Orioles will not compete in the AL East until Peter Angelos sells the team.

7:00am: Alarm sounds blasting John Denver’s “Thank God I’m a Country Boy”.

7:20am: Eat a healthy breakfast consisting of coffee, grapefruit, hard boiled eggs, and Old Bay crab seasoning.

7:44am: Start drive in to work. Listening to Mike and Mike in the Morning as Golic mentions that he likes Jacobs Field in Cleveland more than Camden Yards. Switch over to FM, sing along to “Firework” by Katy Perry.

8:30am: Work starts with a morning staff meeting. Boss notices my Oriole tie, asks me if this is the year where the O’s finally crack .500. Meeting adjourns, sneak into bosses office to pour Old Bay crab seasoning into his Green Tee Frappachino.

10:00am: First time at computer, mark all emails “as read” then proceed to check fantasy stats from the night before. Notice that I’m already in last place, instantly regret taking John Axford with my #1 overall pick.

11:30am: Lunch comes early. Go out and grab food with coworkers. Cover hot wings in Old Bay crab seasoning. Overhear Yankee fans at the bar lauding their team for the Opening Day win over Detroit. These fans are convinced that the Yankees will follow up last seasons playoff disappointment with another World Series Championship in 2011. Pour Old Bay crab seasoning in their Red Bull & vodkas.

1:05pm: Conference call with corporate. Keep laptop open during meeting to watch first pitch of Astros/Phillies. Roy Halladay looks good. Halladay could have been an Oriole if organization had the prospects to trade Toronto and if Baltimore were still a place where free agents wanted to play. Drizzle a sprig of Old Bay crab seasoning into my eyes.

5:30pm: On way home from work, wife calls to say that we are out of milk. Stop by the grocery store only to run into a troop of Girls Scouts selling cookies. Go to buy a few packages of thin mints when the troop leader, wearing a pink Red Sox hat, notices my Oriole tie and tell me that the “Sawx” are going to win it all this year. I thank her for the cookies before covering a box of Samoas in Old Bay crab seasoning.

7:10pm: Ready for first pitch when infant son begins to cry. Ask wife if she can feed him in a different room so that I can watch the Oriole game in peace. On way out, wife tells me that she wants our son to root for the Yankees anyway. Skip the beer, go right to the whiskey w/Old Bay crab seasoning.

8:52pm: Well played game so far. Jeremy Guthrie gave the team 6 solid innings and Vladimir Geurerro has two hits including a 2 run homerun. Baltimore leads 3-2 heading into the 7th inning. Buck goes to the the bullpen and brings in Michael Gonzalez. Gonzalez proceeds to walk the bases loaded forcing Showalter to bring in Jim Johnson. Johnson’s first pitch to Evan Longoria is deposited over the right field fence and into the Ray Tank for a grand slam. Rays 6 Orioles 3. All out of Old Bay crab seasoning.

9:45pm: Final score, Rays 7 Orioles 4. Baltimore falls a game behind the division lead which is sadly the closest they will be to winning the AL East all season long. Kiss baby son goodnight, drive out to grocery for more Old Bay crab seasoning.

11:12pm – Finally get into bed, keep Sportscenter on in the background. Baseball Tonight is talking about the Rays/O’s game. John Kruk wonders if all the Orioles offseason moves will make any difference this season at all. Turn off television. Begin cold sweat.

view from Tropicana Field courtesy of @JGuthrie46

View from Spring Training: 2011 Texas Rangers

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2011 Texas Rangers

NFL Equivalent – Arizona Cardinals: Not much behind this comparison except that in recent years both teams, the Cardinals and Rangers, have lost championship game(s) to more established and beloved franchises. Before that, both were kind of obscure entities that the general public didn’t hear much about unless the manager was caught doing drugs or the starting quarterback was giving up on his team.

Google Search: Should Neftali Feliz start or close? Does Michael Young want to be traded or is he happy as a DH? Is Ron Washington still sporting a fake mustache? These are questions the reigning AL champs need to answer as the 2011 season begins. The Rangers have decided that Feliz will in fact remain the teams closer but this decision has not stopped fans/columnists from clamoring for a change. With the offseason acquisition of 3B Adrian Beltre, veteran Michael Young has been forced into a new role as DH and reports out of Arlington were that Young was none too pleased with the Rangers front office and requested a trade. Rangers would be very wise to keep Young who remains a very valuable bat and versatile infielder.

Famous Movie Quote: We’re adding a little something to this month’s sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anybody want to see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you’re fired. Alec Baldwin from Glengarry Glen Ross

A-B-C. Always-Be-Closing! Another memorable line from the too often overlooked, seldom cited 1992 classic starring Kevin Spacey, Al Pacino, the late Jack Lemmon, and Alec Baldwin. I see a lot of Jack Donaghy in Baldwin’s character from Glengarry Glen Ross. Of course, after 19 years, and 100 lbs, Baldwin is now twice the man he use to be. Making it to the World Series in 2010 was a huge statement for the Texas Rangers franchise. Expectations are once again high as most baseball people pick Texas to return to the playoffs in 2011. This year, is just getting to the World Series enough or is A-B-T (Anything-But a Title) considered a little bit like a set of steak knives? 2011 prediction: 88-74, 1st place AL West.

view from BB&T Coastal Field courtesy of @carolinakidder

View from Spring Training: 2011 New York Yankees

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2011 New York Yankees

NFL Equivalent – New England Patriots: Like a surly, disoriented amnesiac, I find myself wondering aloud, “How the heck did I get here?”  At the risk of ceding some of my objectivity, I happen to despise both of these teams.  Beautiful new state-of-the-art stadiums, angry little Napoleonic coaches, rabid fan bases, and poised, dashing gentlemen leaders all link these two uber-successful franchises.  Yeah, that and the billions of dollars of Midwestern shipping and Northeastern foodstuffs money with which the Steinbrenners and Krafts start the fires that burn up their luxury tax bills.  But I’m not bitter.

Google Search: This winter, the Yanks signed SP Cliff—wait, no they didn’t!  They landed 1B Adrian—nope!  New York was able to trade for SP Zack—wait, what?!  For once, the Yankees seemed to miss the boat on all of the available big names that were available this off-season.  The one move they did execute was to lure away RP Rafael Soriano from the Rays, for whom he closed brilliantly in 2010.  He will move to the 8th Inning for New York, and act as a very expensive insurance policy for closer Mariano Rivera, who seems to be channeling his inner Benjamin Button.  On offense, the names remain the same.  SS Derek Jeter signed a contract and built a big house.  3B Alex Rodriguez ate some popcorn.

Famous Movie Quote: I’ll be back. – Princess Leia, The Empire Strikes Back.

Before Schwarzenegger made the line famous, the cruller-braided Carrie Fisher used the eponym to let everyone know that they hadn’t quite seen the last of her.  Fans and analysts that are writing the Evil Empire of the AL East off might want to keep that in mind.  Their bats are ridiculous, highlighted by the best 3-4-5 in all the land in 1B Mark Teixeira, Rodriguez, and 2B Robinson Cano.  Rodriguez, incidentally, has had an absolutely torrential Spring.  Maybe there actually is something about Mary!  The bullpen will be great, especially in the late innings… as usual.  The only question marks that linger are behind the plate and behind SP C.C. Sabathia’s still-sizeable frame.  I get the sense that the Pinstripers will be involved in quite a few barnburners this summer.  But will it be enough to hang with the Red Sox?  As Yoda would say, “See, we shall.” 2011 record: 95 – 67; 2nd Place AL East

view from Steinbrenner Field courtesy of @John_Padgett

View from Spring Training: 2011 Philadelphia Phillies

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2011 Philadelphia Phillies

NFL Equivalent – Baltimore Ravens: And the Mid-Atlantic is alive and well!  The Ravens made a name for themselves during the last decade with a lights-out defense that put the fear of god in opponents.  To me, nothing was more terrifying on a Sunday night than hearing Fabolous open the broadcast, Mike Patrick crowing about “guys flying around the field”, and seeing Ray Lewis and Ed Reed wearing all black.  That fear returned this past season, and, with a possibly historic starting rotation in Philly for 2011, the NL East is already a bit a quiver.  Both sides have home run hitters in the Ravens’ RB Ray Rice and the Phillies’ 1B Ryan Howard.  With strong fan bases and relatively new stadiums, this comparison—for once—actually makes some sense.

Google Search: The Phillies very much held ground this offseason, with one rather notable exception.  P Cliff Lee is here to firm up a starting rotation that already featured three All-Stars….. and Joe Blanton.  OF Jason Werth is gone, replaced by the handy Ben Francisco, who is actually a typical “Skoal Guy”: great in a pinch, but rather unpleasant when left in for too long. The Fightin’ Phaithful can also exhale, after the announcement that 2B Chase Utley’s opening day replacement will be IF Wilson Valdez, and not, after all, Luis Castillo.

Famous Movie Quote: Forget everything you’ve seen on television and in the movies. – Denzel Washington from Philadelphia.

In the case of the ’11 Phillies, this may actually be apt.  With a staff anchored by two horses in Roy Halladay and Cliff Lee and buffeted by Roy Oswalt and Cole Hamels—two righties and two southpaws, if you’re scoring—and a battle-tested clubhouse, this team could make a run at the record books.  They are, nearly, to a man, the same team that won the NL East easily last year.  They have an American League lineup with speed at the top, thunder in the middle, and a bunch of pests at the bottom.  OF Shane Victorino is a guy that just about everyone would kill for to have in their team’s lineup, and might STILL be the most underrated player in the game.  Lots of pundits are predicting that the Phillies’ weakness lies at the back of their bullpen, where closer Brad Lidge will be set up by RP Ryan Madson and RP Jose Contreras. 2011 record: 102 – 60; 1st Place NL East

view from Citizens Bank Park courtesy of @EveryDe