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At the Intersection of Sports and Culture

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Resume Building at the PGA Championship

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Get those resumes ready, Tiger* needs a new caddie. Good friend, and looping novice, Bryon Bell is just not going to cut the mustard. Qualifications for a permanent caddie include but are not limited to: 10+ years experience on the PGA tour, a minimum of 2 major championships, and most importantly, complete discretion/secrecy when it comes to the personal affairs of the world’s former #1 golfer. Regardless of who’s carrying the bag for Tiger, I do not expect him to contend at the PGA Championship this weekend, even though Vegas has him at 10-1 odds, right alongside other favorites like Adam Scott and Rory McIlroy. All of this begs the question, who do I like to hoist the Wanamaker Trophy Sunday night?

Predicting the PGA Championship

Bronze: Jason Day – Why do professional golfers like Day choose to stay in mobile homes the week of major tournaments? I first remember hearing about this strange phenomenon back in John Daly’s rustic heydey, but in his case a Winnebago made perfect sense. Jason Day is a world class golfer with an awesome Australian accent, gorgeous young wife, and millions already in the bank. What’s he doing shacking up in trailer parked at the local Chick-Fil-A?

Silver: David Toms – Had to go with at least one veteran this week in the ATL. Speaking of the South, how swampy is the Atlanta Ahtletic Club going to get this week? I’m guessing we’ll be able to conduct a rorschach test based solely on the different sweat patterns emerging from the bottoms of all the different soaked pairs of dungarees. We should all be thankful that Chicago Bulls forward Carlos Boozer is not a golfer. That man sure does know how to perspire.

Gold: Dustin Johnson – While vacationing in northern Wisconsin last week, I played golf with an older gentleman from the Northwoods whose given name was Sampson but who introduced himself as “Snake”. Snake, as you can imagine, was quite the interesting character. One of his favorite hobbies – alongside fishing for muskie and playing in a polka band – was making his own golf clubs. I first noticed his homemade clubs when he unsheathed a massive driver that looked exactly like the r11 used by Dustin Johnson. When I asked Snake why he choose to make his own clubs his response was: “what’s the difference between a $400 driver and a $100 driver? (Pause) $100”. Simple logic really.

*love this picture from the Atlanta Athletic Club Courtesy of @JamesHaddockSSN. Totally looks like he got up super early and disguised himself as a large oak tree just for this one moment where he could snap a photo of an unsuspecting Tiger Woods. Good journalists know no bounds.

 

 

Avoid the Heat Dome By Burning Fossil Fuels

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Here’s a quick preview of some of the “major” sports on tv this weekend. A lot of folks love to whine about the lack of sporting events during these the dog days of summer but for me, I look at these next few weeks as an opportunity to catch up on some of the sports that would go otherwise overlooked if it weren’t for the fact that there was nothing else on. And when it’s as hot outside as it is right now, better to burn all sorts of fossil fuels by hovering in front of your AC alongside the incandescent glow of your HDTV than attempting to brave life under the heat dome. (I swear, somebody needs to trademark the phrase “Heat Dome” before Tom Cruise get’s his hands on it and makes it the title of his next Mission Impossible movie.)

Tour de France: If you happen to tune in to Versus this weekend, prepare to be absolutely blown away by the conditioning of these great cyclists. Of course, unless you’ve been living under a rock this past decade, you probably still have some doubts as to whether or not these athletes are cheating. And honestly, just how do these guys ride 200K up a series of high mountains and bounce back in time to do the same thing all over again the next day? You could pump my blood full of as much oxygen as you want and I’m still not coming anywhere close to the top of Alpe-d’Huez unless it is by helicopter.

RBC Canadian Open: Only for the few golf struck souls still fighting their way through Open Championship withdrawal. Or, if you happen to live in the lower 48 and are looking for a brief respite from theses excruciatingly hot/humid conditions, tune in and experience beautiful Vancouver complete with its temperatures  in the 70’s and humidity low enough that the horizon won’t look like it is covered in a waxy film.

MLB Baseball: And you thought you were close to overheating. The Mets and Cardinals completed their game Thursday in a little over 2 hours. It was so hot at Citi Field today that even Roy Halladay became a little dehydrated and he’s not even scheduled to start again until Sunday…in Philadelphia. Some of the marque matchups this weekend include White Sox/Indians, Tigers/Twins, and Braves/Reds. Safe to say that the AL Central and NL Wild Card races will become a bit clearer by Monday.

Women’s Professional Soccer: What, now that the World Cup is over you don’t care anymore? Unfortunate but certainly not unexpected.

view from Citi Field courtesy of @paulsidoti

 

Live from a Sand Dune in Sandwich England

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By Sunday morning, I was a little burned out by all the Open Championship coverage. Don’t get me wrong, I love that ESPN, unlike other networks covering golf, is willing and able to show the entire round as opposed to just the back 9. But, I knew that maybe I had had enough when my dreams were starting to be narrated by Peter Alliss.

With all the Open Championship coverage I was able to develop a deep familiarity with the players and course. For instance, how did ESPN manage to frame those nuclear power plant silos in the background of every single shot from Royal St. George’s? It was like an optical illusion. By Sunday I felt like those omnipresent smoke stacks from Sandwich, England were going to make there way back to my hometown. And with the players, you really start to develop a personal attachment to a golfer when you wake up at 4am on Thursday morning to watch their first shot of the tournament. I never would have guessed that I could have developed such an attachment to Raphael Jacquelin.

It was certainly fun to watch Darren Clarke close out an Open Championship, even with the two Americans, Phil Mickelson and Dustin Johnson nipping at his heels for most of the afternoon. I have always held a fondness for Clarke. It could be because he comes across as a really jovial guy, man of the people if you will, and someone who all golf fans remember watching dominate the 2006 Ryder Cup only weeks after losing his wife Heather to breast cancer. I’m also happy for Northern Ireland. Who knew that a country the size of Connecticut, and the population of West Virginia, would claim 3 of the last 6 majors. Time for New England to step up their golf game!

At some point I hope to spend a fortnight in England catching both the final weekend of Wimbledon and all four rounds of an Open Championship. And after watching as much links golf as I have this past weekend, what with all the rain/wind/sand, at least I’ll have a pretty good idea of what to pack.

view from the Open Championship courtesy of @robbycharles

Steve “The King of the Midwest” Stricker vs. Derek “The King of New York” Jeter

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While watching the first round of the Open Championship with a friend of mine we started talking about what a cool guy Steve Stricker seems to be. We dubbed Stricker the “King of the Midwest” for his unfailing ability to win big golf tournaments in America’s heartland. Somehow, the subject of Derek Jeter reaching the 3000 hit milestone came up and then BOOM – it hit us. Which of the two “Kings” would be better to hang out with: tailgating w/ Stricker before a Wisconsin Badger football game or sitting courtside at a Knicks game with Derek Jeter? Fortunately, this question cannot be answered with a simple yes or no so instead I had to break it down into categories.

Food/Beverage: Part of what makes Wisconsin/Big Ten football so enticing is the pregame tailgate. Find me one American who wouldn’t like to spend a Saturday afternoon in the fall stuffing their face full of bratwurst and washing it all down with an ice cold Leinekugel. Stricker also strikes me as the kind of guy who understands how to properly operate a smoker and, for the record, there is no better way to kill 4 hours than slow cooking a brisket. At Madison Garden everything is so overpriced. I’m sure Jeter would be kind enough to pick up the tab but that wouldn’t stop me from feeling somewhat guilty for throwing back a whole bunch of Nathan’s Famous hot dogs and $12 Heineken’s. On a side note, who chooses to drink Heineken anyway? I think my dad did once but that was way back in the 80’s when every adult male in their late 30’s was emulating Gordon Gekko.  Advantage Stricker

Entourage: I’m guessing Jeter would have to bring along his girlfriend Minka Kelly which would be pretty cool because she’s gorgeous and we could talk all about her HUGE role in Friday Night Lights. However, top to bottom, it’s hard not to take the Badger faithful over Jorge Posada, Mariano Rivera, and Gerald Williams. Gerald Williams you may say. Well, I too was wondering what the heck the Eddie Murphy look a like, and former Yankee, was doing sitting in Jeter’s private box during the 3000 hit game. Either the two remain close or there was a major glitch in security that day.  Advantage Jeter

Conversation: I feel like Jeter would be really distracted during out brief time together. Sitting courtside isn’t the most conducive environment for quality conversation what with the action only a few feet away. Not to mention that all of New York would be passing by our seats and starting one of those brutally annoying and played out “Derek Jeter” chants. Conversely, there is no better atmosphere for friendly banter than the tailgate. And who better to spend hours talking to than a professional golfer? These guys spend rounds of golf shooting the breeze with their caddies and fellow competitors. So they have a lot of practice and would certainly be able to carry on a conversation with a 20 handicap like myself. I would also love to ask Stricker how he and Tiger Woods became such good friends and Ryder Cup playing partners. They seem like such different people and I as far as I know Stricker prefers IHOP over Perkins. Advantage Stricker

Exposure/Bragging Rights: Trust me, your friends would not really care that you traveled all the way out to Madison to see a Badger football game from Camp Randall with Steve Stricker. To me, that’s the charm of the experience, getting to blend in with the crowd. At MSG, with the Yankee Captain, there would be no such thing as blending in. In fact, your face would be plastered on the jumbotron during most timeouts. All of your friends could watch the game from home and see you sitting directly across from the Knicks bench and wonder why they aren’t as lucky. Who knows, you may even get yourself a halftime interview with Walt “Clyde” Frazier, which to me would more than make the whole experience. Advantage Jeter

Atmosphere: Madison in the fall trumps NYC in the winter/spring. Even though the big city is truly one of the most beautiful places to be during the holiday season. The pace of Midwestern life suites my current station in life much more than the busy, on the go pulse of NYC. The people of Wisconsin are also much more understanding of an outsider than the Garden faithful. New Yorkers can smell an outsider a mile away and will test you if they sense that you do not belong. Whereas the people of Madison are just so darn happy to have another person to have a beer with.  Advantage Stricker

Stricker wins 3 to 2.

 

Wednesday Evening Worries: Claret Jug Edition

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I’m worried that….

I don’t totally understand how to differentiate between links golf and “regular” golf. Is links golf confined to the British Isles? Must it involve bunkers that look more like sand dunes and fairway rough which resembles the African savannah? I asked my dad for some clarification but he didn’t really know the difference either. So in a last ditch effort to uncover some sort of clarification on the matter I turned to the absolute last place you should look for information…Wikipedia. After reading up on links golf I discovered that the majority of my assumptions were pretty much correct to begin with which made me feel much better about being able to accurately predict the 2011 British Open.

with so many European favorites to pick from that I’m going to settle on an American to win the 2011 Open Championship. Of all the golfers from the States playing this weekend, Nick Watney seems like the trendiest pick of golf commentators and social media mavens. One name that hasn’t come up much in regards to winning the British Open this year is Dustin Johnson. Sort of surprising really since Dustin was a grounded club and a disastrous final round front 9 from winning both the 2010 PGA Championship and US Open respectively. If I were to pick an American to win this week at Royal St. Georges I would have to go with Steve Stricker. The King of the American Midwest is riding high after his win at the John Deere Classic, plus all good things come to those from Madison, Wisconsin.

my pick of Lee Westwood to win the 2011 Open Championship is way too predictable. But you know what, when it’s 10:44 at night and you’re planning on waking up at 4am to catch the beginning of the 1st round from Sandwich England, slow and steady becomes a whole lot more appealing.