If my twitter feed is correct, and Chris Mortensen is not intentionally misleading us all, then the NFL lockout is going to end on either Thursday or Friday. After roughly 131 days of modest suffering, a lot of us football fans have been able to dedicate much more space in our brains to other important pursuits. What follows is a quick list of 32 things, 32 being the # of NFL teams, we here at VMS learned while doing everything humanly possible to not look, listen, or touch anything having to do with either Roger Goodell or DeMaurice Smith.
#1 – how to properly restring a weed wacker.
#2 – that Rosie Larsen may or may not have been murdered.
#3 – and that we really don’t care anymore because we’re never ever ever going to watch another episode of The Killing on AMC.
#4 – to not just blindly trust the quality of a new show because it airs on the same network as Mad Men, Breaking Bad, and The Living Dead.
#5 – unless that network is HBO.
#6 – which in that case, check out Game of Thrones. Think Lord of the Rings with fewer hobbits and much more sex.
#7 – speaking of a royal family, we learned that Philippa is about to become a very popular name for newborn girls worldwide.
#8 – bridesmaids can wear white and wear it very well.
#9 – on the subject of politics, President Obama was in fact born in this country.
#10 – ignorance should not be construed as patriotism.
#11 – and if you are going to accuse somebody of something so potentially destructive you better have your facts straight. [Read more…]