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Rich Uncle Pennybags 2012 MLB Preview

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Last year VMS did individual previews for each of the 30 MLB teams. In the end, that process was both time consuming and slightly ineffective. This year I have tried something a bit less labor intensive yet an idea we can all relate to. With that in mind, it is now time to take a few trips around the Monopoly board as I use the beloved game to preview the 2012 MLB season.

Dark Purple (the welcome mats)

Mediterranean Avenue – Houston Astros, Baltic Avenue – Oakland A’s

The only thing that could have kept the Astros out of the board game basement would have been if they changed their name back to the Colt .45’s. As for the A’s, maybe a new stadium will change their future fortunes.

Railroads (surprising overachievers)

New York Mets, Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, Cleveland Indians

Individually, the railroads are essentially worthless entities. However, when combined they form quite the formidable conglomerate. In the case of the Mets, Cubs, White Sox, and Indians expectations are fairly low but something tells me that a couple of these teams will surprise us all and remain in contention through the All Star break.

Light Blue (proud yet pathetic)

Oriental Avenue – Baltimore Orioles, Vermont Avenue – Pittsburgh Pirates, Connecticut Avenue – San Diego Padres

The light blues are your first real opportunity around the board to score a semi desirable property. I don’t know what the statistics show but it sure does seem like a lot of players land on these three pieces of not so prime real estate. Speaking of people landing on something, the Orioles, Pirates, and Padres have been getting stepped on for years. Just one winning season, that’s all us Orioles fans are asking for!!!

Light Purple (too old with too far to go)

St. Charles Place – Minnesota Twins, States Avenue – Atlanta Braves, Virginia Avenue – St. Louis Cardinals

There’s something about taking that turn around Just Visiting that gets participants all sorts of hot and bothered. Unfortunately, Monopoly is very rarely won or lost in the light purples. Fans of the Twins, Braves, and Cardinals know a thing or two about winning. This year things could be different as all three are beginning to trade on name more than talent. Too bad to since you haven’t lived until you’ve tried the Walleye Skewer at Target Field.

Water Works & Electric Company (meh)

Milwaukee Brewers, Arizona Diamondbacks, Colorado Rockies, Seattle Mariners

I’ve been playing Monopoly for most of my life and I still can’t figure out exactly how you make money off of either Water Works or Electric Company. All I know is it somehow involves percentages and I was never any good at fractions to begin with. The Brewers, Diamondbacks, Rockies, and Mariners are equally as hard to figure out which is surprising considering 2 of 4 made the postseason in 2011. East coast bias? Perhaps, but how many of you living west of the Mississippi were even aware that the MLB regular season started last week in Japan?

Orange (can’t you just smell the free parking?)

St. James Place – Kansas City Royals, Tennessee Avenue – Toronto Blue Jays, New York Avenue – Washington Nationals

The Royals, Jays, and Nationals have all been picked to have breakout seasons in 2012. And while these teams are at least one year, or in the case of the Jays a different division, away from competing for a playoff spot, I’d be willing to bet that most Monopoly winners make more money off of the oranges than they do either Boardwalk or Park Place.

Red (avenue of longshots and dreams)

Kentucky Avenue – Miami Marlins, Illinois Avenue – San Francisco Giants, Indiana Avenue – Cincinnati Reds

When you get to the reds it’s time to play for keeps. I expect all three of these teams, the Marlins, Giants, and Reds, to make the playoffs but don’t feel as if any will contend beyond the divisional round. These teams are all excellent examples of how weak the National League is this year. None of three would make the playoffs if they were in the American League.

Yellow (anything less than a championship)

Atlantic Avenue – Philadelphia Phillies, Ventnor Avenue – Texas Rangers, Marvin Gardens – Detroit Tigers

I for one have always wanted to know more about the etymology of Marvin Gardens. Is it really named after a guy named Marvin? If so, what was so nice about his garden? In any case, the yellow block treads on very perilous territory given its close proximity to the Go To Jail space. The Phillies, Rangers, and Tigers could easily find themselves behind bars this season if the injuries mount and Miguel Cabrera continues to field ground balls off of his orbital bone.

Green (crowd pleasers)

Pacific Avenue – Boston Red Sox, North Carolina Avenue – Los Angeles Angels, Pennsylvania Avenue – New York Yankees

The green properties are a nice, relatively inexpensive alternative to Boardwalk and Park Place. Some players may even tell you that they prefer the green monopoly over the blue. There is however nothing cheap about the Red Sox, Angels, and Yankees who all end up spending, and making, more money than just about any other MLB franchise. But all the hotels in the world can’t make up for a lack of starting pitching depth, flawed lineup, and an overly contentious manager.

Blue (the names say it all)

Park Place – Los Angeles Dodgers, Boardwalk – Tampa Bay Rays

It’s official, I’ve caught Dodger fever. And why not? There isn’t another National League team that really jumps off the page plus after years of playing under the dark shroud of the McCourt’s, Chavez Ravine will finally become an enlightened destination under the stewardship of new owner Magic Johnson. And for the Rays, I’m picking Tampa to win the whole thing in 6 games. Love their young pitching. Love Desmond Jennings. Heck, I even love Joe Maddon’s shorts.

 view from Ed Smith Stadium courtesy of @EddieInTheYard

You Can’t Spell Optimism and Orioles Without an O, I, & S

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I’m getting sick and tired of all the baseball fans out there hating on the Baltimore Orioles. Since when did we become a sports society built on a foundation of hostility, name calling, and dismissive cynicism? Yes, the Orioles haven’t had a winning record in 14 seasons. And so what if they still play in the uber-competitive AL East with an owner, Peter Angelos, who is more concerned with maintaining a lucrative law firm and regional sports network than putting a winning product on the field.  Certainly as a lifelong Orioles fan I have every right in the world to compose a 1000 word missive bashing the Birds for over a decade of ineptitude. But instead, I’m going to turn the other cheek and do like my brethren over at Camden Chat and give you 8 quality reasons for optimism if you’re a Baltimore Orioles fan in 2012.

1 – New Uniforms/Old Logo: Murray. Ripken. Palmer. Reimold. Andino. This is Birdland!!! In all honesty, Baltimore was probably due for a minor uniform alteration and as much as I love the ornithologically correct bird, the cartoon Oriole does bring us back to a day and age when the team was one of the prohibitive favorites in the American League. Now if we can just get Brooks Robinson healthy and back manning the hot corner.

2- Weight Watchers Worked For Me: Speaking of third baseman, Mark Reynolds supposedly lost over 20 pounds this offseason and is dedicated to improving his defense which is a very good thing since he committed 31 errors last season. To be fair, in his first season with Baltimore Reynolds did compile some impressive offensive numbers leading the team with 37 HRs and 86 RBI. The free swinging slugger also cut down on his strikeouts as well. Between a slimmed down Reynolds, and rock solid SS JJ Hardy, the left side of the infield should be in reliable hands this season.

3 – Dylan Bundy and Manny Machado: Most casual baseball fans haven’t heard of either of these two rising stars down on the Orioles farm but the mere mentioning of either prospect is enough to give Birdland goosebumps. Machado, a SS from Miami, has drawn comparisons to a young Alex Rodriguez and while I would certainly take ARod’s production for the next decade, I could really do without the banned substances and failed Snow White parodies.

Bundy, a right handed pitcher and 4th overall pick in the 2011 draft, makes throwing a baseball 100 mph look easy. (Think Rory McIlroy hitting a driver or Meryl Streep accepting an Academy Award.) Probably too early to expect a big league call up for either player this season but the future is certainly looking brighter with these two horses in the stable.

4 – The Life Of Brian: Brian Matusz spent the entire offseason working out with Brady Anderson in SoCal. I’m ok with his strength and conditioning program so long as it didn’t involve any hyperdermic needles and helps the young lefty pitcher return to his once promising form. 2011 was all but a lost year for Matusz who entered the season with an injured abdomen region and was never able to find the form that made him such a promising pitcher during the second half of 2010. Maybe a healthy, stronger Matusz can help eat up some of the innings that would have been consumed by Jeremy Guthrie had the former Orioles starter not been traded to Colorado.

5 – The United Nations of Pitching: I hope being permanently kicked out of South Korea was worth it. New GM Dan Duquette made a concerted effort to beef up the international scouting department and in the process managed to add a few veteran pitchers. Wei-Yin Chen and Tsuyoshi Wada could add some much needed depth to the starting rotation and hopefully challenge some of the younger arms like Chris Tillman, Jake Arrieta, and Zach Britton.

6 – Following the Wieters: After a gold glove winning 2010 where he hit 22 HRs and threw out 37% of potential base stealers, Matt Wieters has emerged as one of the best catchers in baseball. Buster Olney has already begun to  speculate about Wieters plans post playing career and believes the Orioles catcher has a chance to eventually emerge as a top managerial candidate a la Joe Girardi. Here’s hoping for at least another decade behind the Camden Yards dish before Wieters even considers contemplating a second career.

7 – Sigh No More: It has been too long since we last saw Brian Roberts take the field for the Baltimore Orioles. Recently the former all star second baseman has shown signs of overcoming a concussion that has kept him sidelined for nearly an entire year. It wasn’t long ago that Roberts was a considered a hot commodity and the cornerstone of the franchise. Now all the diminutive spark plug can do is take it one day at a time while the Orioles wait for the return of an undeniable difference maker.

8 – The AL Least?: The Orioles division can’t be as strong as it has been in the recent past. The Red Sox are bound to revolt against some of the policies being implemented by new manager Bobby Valentine. The Yankees lineup is getting older and the Rays can’t possibly continue their magic, even with one of the most impressive pitching rotations in baseball. If everything goes right this could be the year that Baltimore finally breaks the .500 barrier.

Remember, it’s Spring Training. Optimism reigns supreme.

view from Ed Smith Stadium courtesy of @kevindayhoff