NBA Watchability Index For Parents: January 15, 2015

Infants are not all affected by sound the same way. Case in point, when our oldest son was a baby he would wake up every time my wife or I would walk to the bathroom. (I blame the creaky floorboards as much as anything.) With our second kid, to steal a line from Christmas Vacation, you can drive a “dump truck through a nitroglycerine plant” and not disturb him from his slumber. (Don’t worry, his hearing checks out just fine.) We’ve been told that this is nothing more than a case of ‘second child syndrome’ whereas unlike with your first, baby #2 has an innate understanding of their place in the pecking order and how as parents our attention is rarely undivided. This will most likely change once they morph into sulky adolescents but until that time it’s nice to know that I can urinate without fear of causing a nuclear meltdown.

5 Baby Bottles (Watch Those Little Eyes Glaze Over)

Oklahoma City Thunder @ Houston Rockets (8:00 PM)

We are all waiting for the Thunder to turn it on here as they’re in desperate need of a big push during the second half of the season to make it into the playoffs.

4 Baby Bottles (Must Keep Head In Upright Position)

Cleveland Cavaliers @ Los Angeles Lakers (10:30 PM)

It’s been noted before that famed NBA newsbreaker Adrian Wojnarowski has a complicated history with LeBron James. Therefore it may not be all that surprising that the picture painted in Woj’s latest column on the Cavs does not portray James, or his camp of close friends and advisors, in the most positive of lights. The basic gist of the column is reasonable enough which is that LeBron needs to start acting like the leader he sold himself as upon returning to Cleveland. Fair point. We all saw with Miami what kind of transcendent leader LeBron can be and he clearly looks disenchanted with what is going on with this Cavs team right now. However, 1) body language is not always an accurate indicator of team chemistry and 2) the rest of this Cavs team might not be all that good. Wojnarowski touches on this second point writing that the roster has improved with the additions of Mozgov, Smith and Shumpert. Still, as Kevin Love and Kyrie Irving demonstrated when LeBron was off chillaxing in South Beach and JerryWorld, the promise of another Big Three might be more hype than substance and it all starts on the defensive end where unless the Cavs can’t start playing as a cohesive unit (LeBron deserves much of the blame here too) then it really doesn’t matter how many points they score.

3 Baby Bottles (Just A Quick Swaddle & Rock)

New York Knicks @ Milwaukee Bucks (3:00 PM)

Do we know why this game is being played at 3 o’clock in the afternoon? Is there some kind of rally for the Packers before they catch their flight to Seattle that we don’t know about? (London!!!! That makes total sense seeing as the NBA’s expansion into Europe has always been much more plausible than the NFL’s given basketball’s European roots.)

2 Baby Bottles (Burp It Out)

No Games

1 Baby Bottle (Only During An Emergency Diaper Change)

No Games

Bonus Baby Bottle (Because You’re A Generous, Benevalent Soul)

College Basketball: Nebraska @ Wisconsin (9:00 PM)

The Badgers will be without starting point guard Traevon Jackson until March but should still have enough depth to win the BIgTen and garner a top seed come tourney time. Plus with Frank “The Big Sleepy” Kaminsky back tonight from an apparent concussion this game is bound to feature boatloads of 3 point attempts from gangly looking yet incredibly skilled tall white guys. In other words, just your typical night of college basketball in Madtown.